Does the 50/50 Model Work?

The concept of a 50/50 relationship was society's response to the equality concerns of past generations. A 50/50 split means that each person should give the same amount of effort in the relationship. They want to keep things equal, and on a level playing field, but each person in a relationship has their own unique strengths and talents. We may want to cut chores and work straight down the middle, but the reality of life is that while one partner may be a great cook, the other’s best dish might be unidentifiable meat burnt to a crisp. Some partners base their contribution to the relationship on giving the same as the other person, equality becomes the benchmark of the relationship rather than their connection and interest in each other. A 50/50 relationship may ensure a certain type of equity in the relationship but doesn’t instill balance and equality. Unfortunately, all too often this means when the shaky foundation the relationship is built on begins to crumble, each partner wants to walk away with what they feel is rightly theirs, rather than put forth the effort to rebuild and fix their issues. Sometimes it means that relationships become more of a business transaction than about valuing oneself and their partner.

Loving Authority relationships are centered around an age-old concept of balance and exchange in relationships. Some would call it a give and take model. Others have used words like power exchange, dominance and submission, headship, or traditionalism to describe the act of exchanging authority in the relationship. These labors simply allow us to associate good healthy power with whatever preconceived notions we already have. Loving Authority is relationships where those involved are both equally giving 100% towards the same goal, not 50% of their effort, but giving themselves a level of commitment requiring strength, compassion, and consent to each other.